The Learning Pace No One Talks About

    I don’t know about you, but I have noticed a trend in homeschool circles. Is it just me, or does it seem like everyone has their kid in a “higher grade”? I put that in quotation marks because, when you homeschool, is there really a grade level? I mean, unless you go to a homeschool hybrid or co-op where they are put in graded classes, aren’t they just . . . learning at home? I mean, how do you group a kid when there is no group?

    Yet, you hear this all the time from homeschool parents: 

    “John is seven, but he’s doing fifth grade work.” 

    “Brittney is twelve, but she’s starting high school this year.”

    “Adam is looking at graduating at fifteen! He’ll have his masters by the time he’s twenty-one!”

     Sometimes, it can feel like only geniuses homeschool. I promise you, however, this isn’t true. 

    Everyone always talks about how homeschoolers can go at their own pace, but the pace most people emphasize is a fast pace. We hear how homeschoolers aren’t forced to have the curriculum “dumbed down.” We hear how they aren’t held back by the rest of the class. 

    But you know what? Faster isn’t the only homeschool pace. There’s a different pace no one likes to talk about in homeschool circles, but it is just as important, maybe even more important. 

     It’s a slower pace.
 
    People are sometimes shocked when I, a former public school teacher, disagree about things being “dumbed down” in public schools. Because actually, if you look at national and state standards, including the much-despised common core curriculum, it seems the opposite of dumb. It seems pretty rigorous, actually. Kids reading fluently by first grade? Students learning algebraic concepts in second grade? Wow, American kids are really advanced!

      Not actually. 

     Ask any teacher, and they will probably tell you that yes, the curriculum, the standards, sound really great on paper. Unfortunately, the students aren’t learning any of it. “A mile wide and an inch deep” is how we always used to describe it when I was teaching public school. The thing is, teachers feel this constant rush to cover everything at breakneck speed because there is just so much of it. If certain kids fall behind, well the train can’t slow down. Those standardized tests are in April, so they just have to keep chugging along. 

    When it comes to actually learning things, “fast” or “slow” are the wrong words to worry about. The only thing that should matter to a teacher is mastery. 

    So, if your child masters things quickly, fine. However, if it takes them a little longer, so what? You are homeschooling, my sweet Mama. There is no herd to trample your kid if they can’t keep up. Which matters more: that you checked off the lesson on their seven times tables by the end of first grade? Or that they still know that 7x8= 56 for the rest of their lives? When they are an adult, will anyone know or care how old they were when they learned to read? No! The only thing that will matter is that they can understand the things they read. 

    Sometimes, a slower pace is exactly what a child needs. And I’ll be completely honest: you don’t know for sure if that seven year old is really doing fifth grade work. I think some parents rush through curriculum, succumbing to the pressure to prove that their child is ahead. Then, at the end of the day, all their child did was finish the book. They didn’t actually learn it. I’m not saying this is always the case, but I bet it happens more than we’d think. 

    So take a deep breath, Mama. Give your child time to learn at his own pace - no matter what that pace is. You can’t force it anyway. 

    And when you feel the pressure, count to ten and repeat this three times: “I have nothing to prove to anyone.” Do what’s best for your kid, and when people ask what grade they’re in? Just say the grade they would be in at public school according to their age. Trust me, it’s easier! 
    

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